Emotional Aspects

• How and when should I talk with my son about hypospadias?

There is never a perfect time or a perfect way to bring up the subject with your son, and the way you discuss it will depend to a great extent on his maturity and how easy you find it to talk about intimate subjects. You should try to match the way you talk about hypospadias to the developmental stage that your son has reached, and the circumstances of his life.

Some parents worry that discussing hypospadias with their son might actually create problems by reinforcing a sense of “difference”. But in fact, talking openly about things is a good way of dispelling any sense of shame or embarrassment, particularly in such a private area. If the child sees that the parents are willing to talk openly about it, they will learn how to put his feelings into words himself. And it goes further: honesty on the part of the parents will help the child to realise that the subject can be discussed openly, without embarrassment, rather than becoming an unmentionable secret. Understanding his situation, and “de-dramatising” it, will give him the confidence to form relationships with other people free of shame or embarrassment.